


Would you like to meet her? [Abandoned]

by SaffronFinch



Category: The 100 (TV), The 100 Series - Kass Morgan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bellamy is a dad, Bellarke, F/M, Feels, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Kid Fic, Mother!Clarke, Mother-Daughter Relationship, Pregnancy, Protective Bellamy, Reunions, Season/Series 05, Survival, and doesn't know it, so many feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-29
Updated: 2018-11-15
Packaged: 2019-01-06 23:59:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 12,092
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12221595
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SaffronFinch/pseuds/SaffronFinch
Summary: Clarke had expected to be alone for the next 5 years so finding out that she'd be a mother came as a surprise.Six years later the now little girl has changed Clarke's life into one of peace and love.There's one thing though.How would Bellamy react if he found out that there had been someone other than Clarke waiting for him on the ground?Takes place 2214 days after praimfaya.





	1. Eden

**Author's Note:**

> Please keep in mind that this is my first fic also english isn't my native language.  
> I'm always open for suggestions and feedback so make sure to hit that comment or kudos button if you liked it! :)  
> -Finch

She often recalled that memory. The way his hands held her in place, his fingers stroking over her hips ever so slightly. The smell of pine that overcame her as she raked her fingers through his messy hair. It had felt like the whole world stopped when she glanced into his eyes. Deep brown meeting ocean blue.   
She wasn't able to define the look he gave her back then but after many nights of dreaming and thinking about it, she would describe it as a look of adoration. A look of yearning and sadness. How could she be so blind? Why didn't she notice?

Clarke felt tears prickle her eyes. She lifted her arm to wipe them away with her frayed sleeve and let out a sigh.   
"Mummy?"   
She saw the door to the rover open, recollected herself and hopped down from the roof. A face framed by tangled light brown curls was peeking out of the vehicle.   
"Can't sleep," the little girl sniffled. Clarke smiled tiredly. "Me neither sweetheart."

She climbed into the rover and covered them with some furs after leaning over to close the door. Her hand found itself stroking over her daughters head, humming a long forgotten tune her dad had once sung to her when Clarke wasn't able to sleep herself. She watched as the girl closed her dark blue eyes tiredly, giving in to the exhaustion of the day.   
Clarke had no idea how she had gotten so lucky. It was a blessing in disguise really when she gave birth to a healthy child. Counting ten fingers and only nine toes she loved her like she never loved anyone else before.

She found out about her pregnancy rather late, to be honest. Of course, radiation had to be the reason for her exhaustion and morning sickness, the way she wasn't able to eat literally anything without feeling the urge to empty her stomach right then and there. Wrong. So, so wrong.   
It wasn't until she noticed the little bump showing that she came to the conclusion.   
The first thing she felt was a huge surge of happiness and love though it was slowly replaced by dread. She grew panicked. What if the baby was born sick or even worse dead, ‘cause of the radiation? What if she miscarried? She didn't have anyone to help her and no one to take care of her child if she died while giving birth. How was she supposed to take care of a baby on a planet coated with radiation?  
  
Clarke tugged the furs closer to her daughter and let herself feel the relief once again.

She cried tears of joy as she carefully hugged a healthy little bundle to her heart. She noticed the heap of brown locks on her tiny head and held her even tighter.  
Clarke named her Theia, remembering Bellamy's love for mythology. What would she have done to have him with her at that moment.

Yawning Clarke closed her eyes, the serene calmness of earth lulling her to sleep.

 

* * *

 

2214… 2214 days since praimfaya.   
Maybe today's the day.

"Bellamy?"   
Crackle.  
"It's sunny today"  
Silence. Another crackle.  
She readjusted herself on the slightly damp log. It had become her little place. A spot where she talked to Bellamy, even if he never actually answered.

"Theia is still sleeping; I let her rest a bit longer since she had trouble going down last night." Clarke smiled. "You sleeping okay up there? I certainly don't miss those old ark mattresses." She huffed, picking at the moss surrounding her. "I had this big brown stain on my mattress and never knew where it had come from. Thinking about it I'm quite content with not knowing." She joked shaking her head at the thought of it.   
The sky had started turning cloudy by now. A slight breeze rustling through the leaves. It was peaceful. "I miss you Bell. Please don't let us wait too long". With that she turned the radio off and made her way towards the rover. Sure she was sad, she missed Bellamy a lot over the past 6 years, but the feeling of grief and heartbreak had turned into a dull ache. She had become used to being alone with her daughter.  
Theia is her whole world and Clarke was hers.

"Wake up little bean" Clarke watched as Theia's face scrunched up in discomfort.   
She gently squeezed her shoulder. "Want to go see the butterflies today?"   
Suddenly all awake Theia jolted upwards, almost bumping against her mum's nose in the motion. "Yes!" Clarke noticed her daughter scramble around the rover with a determined expression on her face. "Let me put on my shoes and we can go!" She added, dipping behind the back seat trying to get a hold of them.

Clarke had found the shoes in Becca's House which to her delight still stood in all its glory. Becca must have installed some kind of safety system to make it withstand the radioactive wave. Shoes weren't the only thing she found. There were clothes, books, even art supplies, which Clarke treasured dearly. She stored some pencils and a sketchpad in the rover at all times, just in case she got inspired to draw something, even though if that something was a certain face in the beginning. Soon joined by another, younger face.  
She also found a big storage room in the mansion. Lots of food and drinks that would last for years. Clarke still thanks whatever angels there are out there for that.

"Got them!" Startled out of her thoughts she gazed at Theia who proudly held up some badly worn shoes. Grinning she opened the passenger door and put them on in a rush.   
"Alright then. Let me just grab my sketchbook and we can go" Clarke chuckled at Theia's eager expression.

It wasn't a short hike since it usually took them an hour to get to the butterfly field. Theia got all excited and marched up ahead, shoving rather huge ferns apart as she went. They navigated through the forest with ease, the landscape precisely mapped out in their minds. She's glad that her little girl doesn't have to grow up on the ark. Those depressing grey walls rounding up on you wherever you'd go. Here Theia has nature surrounding her.   
It's amazing how the earth has blossomed again. Healing itself from praimfaya, new plants growing and all kinds of nature flourishing. The animals have returned. There were even new species that had formed, fish that would glow in the dark and birds without wings. But the ones Theia loved the most were the butterflies.   
The corners of Clarke's mouth quirked up. She reminded her of Octavia in that aspect. The carefree and adventurous Octavia, the one Clarke first met on the ground. How she wished the bunker would be open right now.

"Mummy! Look we're here!" Theia exclaimed. She stood at the top of a little hill, the forest opening into a clearing. "Coming." Clarke wandered up the slope, slipping a little on the muddy ground.   
The sight in front of them made her breath hitch no matter how many times she'd already seen the butterfly field. There was a vast space in front of them, the forest encircling the meadow like shielding it from any danger. Grass reached up to her thighs and tickled her ankles. Theia took hold of her hand. Hundreds of glowing colorful butterflies were fluttering everywhere, dancing around in the morning sunshine. Clarke squeezed Theia's hand. "Go on" She encouraged her, gently nudging her daughter forward who then took off into the meadow. Clarke watched her reaching towards the butterflies, arms spread out wide, allowing them to land on her sun-kissed skin.

"I wish I could fly." Theia marveled as her eyes squinted towards the sun. "I would love to see all of this from above." She spun around at Clarke who had approached her slowly. "You know what I would love to be able to do?" Theia gazed up at her mother and drew her eyebrows together in question. "I would love to teleport myself and others" Clarke stated kindly "What's teleport mean?" Theia asked   
"It means that when you close your eyes and wish yourself somewhere you'll arrive at that place without even having moved"   
Clarke closed her eyes. "But right now I wouldn't want to be anywhere else but here." Her mouth curved into a gentle smile. "Me neither."

A sudden bang disrupted the peacefulness. Clarke widened her eyes and grabbed Theia by the hand. Birds were flying out of the tree tops screeching in alarm. A puffy cloud of smoke rose in the distance. "What was that?" Theia squeaked and cowered herself behind her mother. "Come on," Clarke whispered trying her best to hide the worry in her voice. She readjusted the rifle on her back and ushered them into the woods. They heard some shouting in the distance. Humans.   
Clarke stopped and heaved Theia onto her hip, the little girl hugging Clarke tightly.   
She would not let some strangers put her daughter in danger.   
Clarke stepped behind a rock and gasped as she took a peek past it. A spaceship, a real spaceship! Clarke surveyed the area. It didn't look like a planned landing. Rubble all over the place a huge crack on one of the walls. But they were nowhere to be seen. No Raven, no Monty… no Bellamy. Someone moaned and Clarke's breath hitched. There were people scrambling out of the ship. All kinds of people. There was enough distance between them to not be in any direct danger but still, Clarke wanted to get the hell away from here.   
She turned her back on the intruders and ran in the direction of the rover, missing the slender figure of a woman with a high ponytail hurrying out of the crack. 


	2. Chapter II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Did you see them?”  
> Theia whispered.  
> Clarke’s stomach felt like it had been turned upside down, the disappointment settling deep in her belly.  
> “No. I didn’t.”

_Who were these people? Why were they here? Are they dangerous?_

Clarke rushed through the trees.

_Were there more of them coming down?_

Theia held on tighter as Clarke took a sharp turn.

“Mummy where are we going?” Her high-pitched voice asked.

“Don’t worry sweetie, we’re heading to the rover.”

It wouldn’t take long.

“We don’t know who they are and why they’re here so we’ll get us into safety first.”

Clarke slowed down a little, now having put enough distance between them and the ship.

She let Theia slip to the ground safely and took her little hand into hers.

“Did you see them?”

Theia whispered.

Clarke’s stomach felt like it had been turned upside down, the disappointment settling deep in her belly.

“No. I didn’t.”

She knew who Theia meant. Her long lost friends that had returned to space. Her friends that had to leave her behind because she didn’t make it in time.

Bellamy.

God what if they were in the spaceship but Clarke didn’t notice them?

She had to turn back later and find out who these people were but she couldn’t put Theia at risk of getting hurt.

* * *

 

The rumble of the engine was like music to her ears.

They had returned to the rover and were now heading deeper into the forest.

Safely out of sight.

“What do you think they want?”

 

“I think they want to settle here. Build a new life on the ground.”

 

“So they won’t leave?”

 

Clarke spared a glance at Theia who has settled into the passenger seat. She was looking out of the window, her little finger tracing lines across the glass.

“I’m not sure. That’s why I’ll have to talk to them eventually. Find out why they’re here.”

 

Theia swung her head to her mother.

“Can I come with you?”

She sounded curious.

Of course, she was curious; she had never seen another human being other than Clarke in her whole life.

The rover jumped a little as it bumped over a rock.

 

“I want you to stay in the rover until I know that it’s safe enough for you to come out okay?”

 

“But why?” 

She whined. Crossing her arms over her chest and slumping back against her seat.

 

“Because as I said we don’t know who they are or if they’re dangerous and I won’t let anything bad happen to you Theia.”

Clarke twisted her head around at her daughter who had now returned to drawing lines across the window.

* * *

 

“Here.”

Clarke placed a packet of nuts into Theia’s lap.

“I’ll be back in a sec I’m just gonna get some water.”

 

Theia nodded, her attention already turned on wolfing down the entire packet.  

Clarke shut the door with a thump and observed the area.

_She’ll be okay; Theia’s intelligent._

 

Clarke started her way through the bushes, securing her rifle just in case.

The stream gurgled in the distance, the promise of fresh water making Clarke step a little faster.

She was just about to head out of the trees when she saw something.

A head of dirty blonde hair appeared.

Clarke clutched at her rifle and looked through the scope.

A woman crouched down at the stream and dipped her arms into the clear water, laughing as she splashed some of the coolness in her face. Clarke turned around. The rover still stood about 10 meters behind her, half of it hidden behind some thicket.

“The water’s fine! Come here and try it!”

Clarke twirled around. A second head had appeared, a slender man sporting an undercut.

Wait.

She knew that voice.

No, it can’t be, her mind has to be playing tricks on her.

The woman sprayed some water at the man, making him laugh at her.

“Harper come on that’s enough we have to find the others!” His voice was friendly though it had an urgent undertone to it. 

Harper.

 

The woman’s name was Harper.

Monty.

_Oh my god._

 

Clarke stopped breathing. She felt hot all over her hands coming up to cover her mouth. “Oh my god” She whispered. Her voice hoarse even to her own ears.

 

Clarke stood up, suddenly feeling incredibly dizzy. She took a tentative step forward.

“Monty? Harper?” She croaked, emerging out of the bushes.

She watched as their heads swung around, suddenly freezing all over.

It felt like time stood still. Everything came to a halt. Clarke started turning anxious.

_Do something-_

All of a sudden Harper jumped up and rushed towards her.

“Clarke! Oh my god you’re;”

“Alive; Yeah”

Clarke exhaled quietly.

Monty had stepped towards them, not quite trusting his eyes.

“We thought you were dead oh my god!”

The end of her sentence got muffled by Clarke’s jacket, Harper had wrapped her up in a hug, holding onto her tightly. A tear slipped down Clarke’s face but her features turned into a smile. Now Monty was there too. Carefully joining them in their embrace making Clarke let out a breathy laugh

 

“Guys you’re suffocating me.”

 

They let go of her, their faces staring at hers in awe.

“How?”

Monty asked hoarsely. Disbelief was written all over his features.

 

“The nightblood worked. I lived in Becca’s lab for a while.”

Clarke smiled at them.

“Where are the others?”

 

Harper looked at the ground.

The smile slipping off her face.

 

Monty squeezed her arm and looked at Clarke

“We got separated; I don’t know if you noticed the spaceship coming down this morning?”

Clarke nodded fiercely.

“Some shit happened up in space. Long story short the people on that ship captured us a few months back. They held us as prisoners, thinking we could give them information on the ground and you know, help them out once we’d have landed.”

He paused.

“Well, the landing didn’t go quite as planned. Half of the ship must have collapsed.”

Clarke stared at him, a sudden dread coating her face.

 

“Are they-” She didn’t dare say it out loud.

 

Monty picked up on her features and reassured her in a comforting tone.

“Yes they are alive but we don’t know where they are. We all scrambled out of a crack in the wall in such a hurry we lost sight of-“

 

Behind them, a twig snapped.

 

They all spun around.

 

There stood Theia, clutching a stone in her hand.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading you all!  
> Be sure to leave some feedback in form of comments or kudos. :)  
> New chapter will be up soon.


	3. Chapter III

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke gulped. This is not how she imagined the reunion to go.

No one moved. Harper and Monty were probably waiting for Theia to spring into action, but she just gripped the stone tighter, a fierce expression on her face.

Clarke gulped. This is not how she imagined the reunion to go.

“Theia?”

The little girl turned her gaze to Clarke. She held her chin upright.

“Theia it’s fine. Come over.”

Monty and Harper just stood there, both of their eyebrows knitted together in confusion. They took in the little girl, all light brown curls, and freckles, deep blue eyes observing the situation.

They watched Theia hurry to Clarke. She dropped the stone on her way over, having sensed that her mother wasn’t in any danger.

She looked at the two outsiders with wonder.

Clarke could feel Harper stare at her, her gaze dropping to Theia and back at Clarke.

Recognition flickered in her eyes.

“Theia I would like you to meet Monty and Harper.”

Clarke said encouragingly.

Monty crouched down to Theia’s size and held out his hand in greeting.

“Nice to meet you. I’m Monty.” Theia looked at his hand in question and tentatively grabbed it with her own.

“Hello.” She whispered subdued and gave him a half smile in return.

“Clarke.”

Clarke tore her eyes away from her daughter to find Harper staring at her intently.

She had a big question mark written on her features which Clarke would laugh at if it weren’t for this completely odd situation they were in right now.

Monty rose next to Harper and lifted a brow.

“This is Theia.” She paused to look down at her girl. She laid a hand on her shoulder and squeezed.

“She’s my daughter.” Harper took a sharp intake of breath while Monty swallowed. His surprised look slowly replaced by a huge smile.

“Your daughter.” He breathed.

 “Clarke wow” He laughed looking at Theia once again. 

Harper meanwhile had kneeled down to her. “Hello there.” She grinned “My name is Harper and I’m so glad to meet you.”

Theia looked at her with big eyes and slowly put out her hand for Harper to shake.

“Are you the ones that flew up into the sky?” She asked quietly.

“I suppose we are.” Harper gave her an encouraging smile which Theia returned hesitantly.

This was Theia’s first contact with other humans. It was only natural for her to be a little anxious, on top of being only six years old.

Clarke cleared her throat.

 

“Come with us. We’ve got some food and blankets in the rover” She announced, successfully winning their attention.

 

* * *

 

It was evening by now, the sun slowly transcending behind the trees. The remaining rays of light guided Clarke and the rest through the woods. Harper, Monty and Theia had made themselves comfortable in the back of the rover.

They were huddled under some furs, Harper nipping at some water and Theia watching Monty as he animatedly told her some kind of story about space. His hands were energetically motioning around the air.

If Monty and Harper were here then the others were roaming the woods at this exact moment. Raven, Emori, Echo, Murphy and Bellamy. They were all out there.

She didn’t know what to feel with that information.

There only ever was Theia and her for the past six years.

Her stomach flipped nervously. She had been right. Day 2214. Today was the day; they had finally made it to the ground.

 

* * *

 

“Take this as well.” She handed Harper a set of blankets.

She nodded and stalked back to the fireplace.

Clarke had driven them to a little cave. It was far away from the landing site and protected them from the oncoming rain.

Closing the door of the rover Clarke paused. There she was. Her little girl, sitting on some furs, smiling as Harper dropped down next to her. Her heart swelled at the image.

“Clarke?”

“Hmm?”

Monty stood behind her. He looked different compared to when she last saw him. His face was calm and his hair shorter. He wasn’t as thin as six years ago, a little stubble on his chin. He looked grown up; No longer the nerdy boy who hurtled down to earth with her.

“I don’t know if it’s my place to ask but I need to know.” He studied her.

Clarke knew what he would ask, she was sure of it.

“Who’s the father?”

Her lashes fluttered.

“Bellamy.” Clarke felt her eyes turn glossy. She tried her best to swallow the tears. She would not break down in front of Monty.

“Bellamy is her father.”

A sad laugh flew past her lips. “He had a daughter on the ground all those years and as desperate as I am to see him-“Clarke wiped at her eyes. The walls she built around her slowly crumbling down. “As desperate as I am to see him, I’m so afraid of his reaction. I’m afraid that he doesn’t want anything to do with us. That he doesn’t even want to meet her. I don’t know if-“

“Hey, Clarke stop” Monty gently pulled her hands away from her face.

“Bellamy would never do something like that. Deep down you know that as well. Yes, He’ll be shocked at first but I’m sure he’ll protect and love her with all his heart.”

He let go of her arm. “You’ll be fine trust me. Now come on. Let’s join the others.”

Monty jerked his head to the fire and smiled.

She let out a steadying breath and nodded, following behind him with calm steps.

 

* * *

 

Theia sat beside Harper. She had pulled one of the blankets right up to her chin. She looked small and fragile.

Clarke lowered herself next to her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders while Harper crawled over to Monty.

“I still can’t believe it. I’m just waiting for me to wake up and find myself back on the ring.” Harper whispered. She was occupied with drawing shapes in the dirt with a stick.  

“I am so glad you’re here.” She said, lifting her head to smile at Clarke.

Clarke gave her a friendly look. “Me too.” She replied quietly.

Theia had fallen asleep next to her, huddled safely in her blanket. Clarke stroked over her hair.

“Now we just have to find the others,” Monty exclaimed.

“I would try to contact them but they ripped us free of all our radios.”

 

Clarke blinked.

 

“I have a radio.”

 Monty just looked at her confused.

“I know we can’t contact them but maybe we can spy on the ship that came down, you know, hack into their communication system.”

She offered at which Monty nodded.

“Yeah, that could work. I’ll try fiddling around with it tomorrow.” He mumbled.

Clarke noticed his lids getting heavy.

 

“When we came down here we expected people.”

Harper had inched closer to the fire. Her worried face turned at Clarke.

 “Why are you two alone?” She asked concerned.

To be honest, Clarke didn’t even know what she meant until it dawned on her.

_The Bunker._

Clarke’s chest felt tight all of a sudden; the question hanging over them heavily.

“I tried“ She started “We tried to open it but the door was buried under so much rubble we didn’t even stand a chance.” Her voice sounded defeated.

“I have tried to contact them many times but never got a reply.”

_No replies. Not ever._

“We should try and open it as soon as we find the others,” Monty said determinedly. Clarke just gave him a tired smile in return. _As soon as we find the others;_

“Let’s rest now, you must be exhausted,” Clarke whispered at Monty and Harper who nodded a bit beaten. They started scrambling around to find a comfortable sleeping position. Clarke lay down next to Theia; Securing her arm over her protectively. Outside some rain had started to fall. She let out a sigh.

_They would figure something out._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're gettinnggg thereee...  
> Be sure to punch that kudos button if you liked this and feel free to comment!  
> -finch


	4. Chapter IV

Clarke woke at sunrise. She long stopped checking her wrist; the absence of her fathers watch always brought a stinging feeling to her heart. Time didn’t really matter anyway when you only had one other person on the ground with you.

She got into the habit of waking up before Theia, her morning routine consisting of radioing the ark.

A smile broke out over her face as she realized that that wasn’t necessary anymore.

 

Clarke glanced around. Monty and Harper were still fast asleep, Theia snoring quietly. She wanted to go for a walk, to see if she could find anything edible out there; but leaving Theia unsupervised while there were people roaming around was out of the question.

Clarke looked over at Monty and sighed. _Sorry, bud…_

She heaved herself upwards and stretched her arms over her head. Quietly she tiptoed over to Monty and shook his shoulder.

“Hey Monty.”

He scrunched his face together and huffed as an answer.

“I need to go and find something edible. Can you keep watch while I’m gone?”

Monty scratched a hand over his stubbly chin and nodded.

“Yeah sure. I’ll take care of them.” He yawned and bent his head towards Theia.

“Alright. Thank you.”

She gave him a last friendly smile before walking off, leaving her rifle with him.

 

It wasn’t the first time she had left Theia alone while she was asleep.

Simply cause there was nothing there that could harm her, But going off while these people were out there? Although Monty had promised to keep watch, an uneasy feeling settled in her stomach.

Sleeping next to her was different. Clarke would be able to act if something happened. She’d be able to protect her. _I’ll hurry up…_

Clarke moved a bit faster, her feet carrying her through the woods she had come to know so well by now.

She surveyed the area and jogged over to a few bushes which carried orange berries.

Well normally.

To her surprise, the bush was completely empty of anything edible. Only the rotten ones were still attached to the branches, holding on as best as they could.

She lifted her head and looked around at the other bushes. Every single one of them was empty.

_Someone had picked them._

_Someone had been here and picked all the berries that could be found._

Clarke’s heartbeat fastened. She didn’t know if that someone had gone very far.

Her hands swung to her back to find it empty. She had left her rifle with Monty. God, she almost felt like a scaredy cat. Freaking out over empty bushes. 

 

It wasn’t as if she used the gun often, but not having it around her, she felt bare.

_The rifle is better of with Monty. He’d be able to protect Theia if something happened._

Clarke settled on pulling out her knife instead.

She was just about to head back to their makeshift camp when a gunshot rang out. It was distant and not anywhere near her but still, she ducked to the ground and clutched her knife tighter in her clammy hands. Her breathing had stopped, her heart beating so fast it felt like it was about to jump out of her chest.

_Thump_

_Thump_

_Thump_

She didn’t have to deal with people firing guns for a long time and definitely didn’t miss it.

She waited _._ No other shots rang out. Whoever fired that gun had stopped.

Clarke was about to jump off the ground and race back to Theia when she heard it.

Footsteps. Hurried and uncoordinated footsteps.

Someone was making their way in her direction, groaning in agony.

Inwardly cursing she pressed her face into the fallen leaves; Dirt scraping at her cheek.

Whoever it was, he was in big pain but still managed to move very fast.

Clarke pressed her eyes closed, somehow feeling like if she couldn’t see him, he couldn’t see her.

He was grumbling and shuffling, heaving and huffing until he wasn’t.

A dull thump indicated that he had fallen to the ground. His muffled breathing slowed.

Clarke opened her eyes and looked past the bushes. He was out of view, he must have passed out.

Carefully but slowly she lifted herself off the ground. She wanted to move around the guy and race off without further notice.

The Clarke six years ago would have stopped and checked for wounds, but not now. Not with her daughter around.

Clarke hurried past the bushes, her head hanging low.

She was completely focused on running back to Camp until something caught her eye. A leathery object lay on the ground, half hidden by leaves.

Was that…

_My sketchbook!_

Clarke ran forward and grabbed it off the ground. It must have fallen out of her pocket in the butterfly fields; she remembered having it with her yesterday.

But how did it move here? Clarke slowly turned her head, a sudden realization hitting her.

That man must have carried it. He must have lost it while running.

She let out a steadying breath and walked towards the figure on the ground.

_No._

A mop of dark curly hair peeked out from under the leaves.

Her breath hitched and her blood ran cold.

For the first time since he left, she wished that Bellamy wasn’t here with her.

That the passed out and hurt man on the ground wasn’t him.

She placed a hand on his shoulder and turned him around.

 

A strangled choke escaped her lips. Tears started streaming down her face and her vision turned unfocused.

This man was unmistakably Bellamy.

Unconscious

Wounded

Breathing unsteady

She didn’t have time to panic.

 _He_ didn’t have time for her to panic.

Clarke hastily wiped a hand over her wet face.

It had turned focused and stoic, complete doctor mode. Clarke took him in.

He had been shot and presumably kept running instead of being taken, only making his wound worse. His left trouser leg was drenched in blood.

Clarke lifted the bottom of his trousers. A heavily bleeding gaping wound stared back at her. He either passed out from pain or blood loss.

She fumbled with the hem of her shirt and ripped it apart.

 _This will do_. _This has to do._

She hoisted his leg up on her knees and started tying the cloth around his calf to slow the bleeding. Sweat was dripping down her forehead, her hair stuck to her cheeks and mouth. Not bothering to wipe her hands over her face she instead placed Bellamy’s leg back on the ground, covering it with his soaked up trousers.

Clarke scurried over to his head and grabbed his hands with hers. She huffed and started pulling him across the ground.

“Don’t do this to me Bell. Don’t die on me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that happened!
> 
> Thank you so much for all the kudos and comments! They mean lots to me!  
> If you liked it be sure to show it :)  
> -finch


	5. Chapter V

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She dragged him through dead leaves and mud, trying to take care when roots blocked their path, but still too determined to keep up a quick pace.  
> She could hear the blood pulsing through her ears, Bellamy’s unconscious face staring up at her with closed eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A shorter chapter this time, since I felt bad about the cliffhanger and needed to get this out as soon as possible :')  
> (Whoops.. this one has some kind of cliffhanger too) 
> 
> By all means please don't mistake me for someone who knows how to treat gunshot wounds. I did a little research and tried to write it out as good as possible. I "edited" Bellamy's wound in the last chapter btw just so you don't ask yourself "wait why is there a bullet still lodged in his leg I thought there was an exit wound?"  
> Other than that, I hope you enjoy reading!

The walk back to their makeshift camp was exhausting. She felt like her arms were about to pop off her shoulders, strained with pulling Bellamy over the ground; which to her special luck wasn’t exactly clear of obstacles. She dragged him through dead leaves and mud, trying to take care when roots blocked their path, but still too determined to keep up a quick pace.  

She could hear the blood pulsing through her ears, Bellamy’s unconscious face staring up at her with closed eyes.

She wouldn’t let herself feel any relief at his presence. Not _yet_.

Clarke cried out in frustration as she tripped over a stone, her eyes were burning with tears that had mingled with sweat.

“Clarke!”

_Thank god_

“Harper, tell Monty to get the rover ready! We need to leave now!”

Her urgent call made the woman nod in the distance and rush off.

_They must have heard the gun going off_

 

Clarke’s muscles screamed as she pulled Bellamy over the slope in front of the cave. She noticed Monty hurrying Theia inside the rover and shutting the passenger door after she was safely seated. 

She felt relief to see her daughter safe, but it was outweighed by the worry about Bellamy.

Harper was running towards her.

“Clarke we’re all packed up and ready to- Oh my god is that Bellamy?”

Harper’s tone had gone all anxious.

Clarke nodded in answer and let Bellamy’s hands go.

She felt like her whole body was aflame, her clammy hands were bright red from all the pressure she had forced upon them. Stretching her palms she turned to Harper.

“We need to get away from here, someone had been following him! Help me get him inside the rover.”

Harper locked her jaw in determination and grabbed Bellamy by the ankles. Together they lifted him into the rover, leaving an ugly trail of blood drops on their way over.

After slamming the door shut, Clarke threw the blankets aside as if they had personally assaulted her, scrambled over Bellamy and pulled a first aid kit out from under the front seat.

“Monty! Drive to Arkadia! Theia can you please hand him the map? I left it in the glove compartment.” The urgency in her voice made them both react instantly.

She heard Monty jam the key in the ignition and felt the rover roaring to life.

Situating herself in a way that Bellamy was out of view from Theia, she yanked the first aid kit open and placed it next to his leg.

“Harper I want you to lay his foot on your knees.”

She complied, lifting his limb upright to prevent blood from surging into his leg.

“Apply pressure to the wound.” She urged on while searching for disinfectant.

Once she found it she started pouring it over her hands.

“I need to get the bullet out,” Clarke said to herself. Her voice tight to her owns ears.

Rummaging through her kit she pulled out some extra long tweezers. Once she got them, she turned over to his leg and studied the wound before carefully extracting the bullet. It hadn’t gone very far and hadn’t hit a major artery which Clarke was relieved about.

Grabbing the disinfectant again, she now started cleaning the wound before bandaging his leg with some battle dressing.

His breathing had returned back to normal and Clarke laid a hand on his chest, only to find it cold to the touch. Pulling one of the blankets out from under her she gently spread it over him.

“Harper you can let go of his leg now,” Clarke whispered, the reality of the situation rushing in.

This was Bellamy in front of her.

He was here.

Clarke choked back on tears and slowly let her head drop to his shoulder in relief. The panic of the situation was slowly subsiding.

“Bell.” She sobbed brokenly, trying to remain as quiet as possible as not to startle Theia. She took his hand into hers and starting caressing it with her thumb, running smooth little circles over his calloused skin.

Clarke lifted her head back up and took a minute to take him in. She had been in such frenzy that she hadn’t noticed his short beard. A new scar had marked the skin of his forehead which she gently traced with her finger, only to notice the necklace around his neck which- She knew that necklace!

Slightly gasping she gently took it in her hands, delicately lacing it through her fingers to stare at the little charm dangling from the chain.

There it was; the silver little crown which Wells had once gifted her.

She used to wear it all around the ark but had to take it off once she was forced into solitary confinement. They were probably afraid that she’d try to strangle herself.

Wiping back a tear Clarke safely rested the little crown back over his heart. He must have found it in the room where they stored all prisoner belongings. Bellamy had once been a guard after all and knew where to find the little locker that had earlier belonged to her.

She shook her head to clear it from all thoughts and checked his bandage again, it had to be changed sooner or later but it would be fine for the time being.

She smiled at him and then looked up at the front seats, only to find Theia watching them intently.

Her eyes glinted with unshed tears and Clarke made a move to comfort her, but her shaky voice stopped her from doing so.

“Is that…” Clarke held her breath. “Is that Daddy?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Please leave a comment or punch the kudos button if you liked it :)


	6. Chapter VI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The sound of footsteps made her stop. They all whipped their heads towards the door. “I think Bellamy woke up.” Clarke stood up smiling and made her way towards the door. She was about to open it when she got pushed to the ground violently, a figure jumped upon her and straddled her to the ground, holding her in a death grip. “Mama!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for 200 kudos! Those really brighten up my day and keep me going :)  
> Other than that, enjoy reading.  
> -Finch

Theia had a look on her face that Clarke had never seen before. She noticed hope in the little girls’ eyes, but there was sadness there as well. She was afraid that her dad would be taken away from her before she even grasped that he was here.

Clarke opened her arms wide and motioned for Theia to climb over to her.

Harper had begun shuffling around, feeling uncomfortable in this intimate situation. She swapped seats with her daughter and turned to Monty instead who was still focused on driving.

“Yes, sweetie,” Clarke said to her in a soft voice. “This is your dad Theia.” 

She squeezed her eyes shut and gave Theia a tight-lipped kiss on the top of her head. The little girl focused on Bellamy, drinking him in, watching his relaxed face.

“Why is he sleeping?” Theia asked and turned up to look at Clarke, who just let out a broken little laugh. “He’s sleeping because he had a long journey behind him. We need to let him rest okay?” Clarke stroked Theia’s hair and let her daughter sag into her embrace.

“Okay,” Theia mumbled and stretched her body in Bellamy’s direction. Clarke watched with awe as her daughter reached for her fathers’ hand, her little palm not even covering half of his. She gently squeezed his fingers and then retreated her hand and turned back into Clarke’s chest.

Clarke tried her best to hold back her tears but the feelings were overwhelming her in oh so many ways.

She just hoped that Bellamy felt the same way once he woke up.

 

Theia always knew how her father looked like. No, not in person of course, but Clarke had drawn him so many times over the past years; Theia wouldn’t have any problem recognizing him.

Clarke had drawn many other things too. She sketched out Arkadia and Polis, showed her daughter a drawing of her aunt Octavia and her grandmother Abby. There were many tales to the pictures and Clarke explained some of the nicer ones in a child-friendly way.

What Clarke really loved talking about were her friends. She showed Theia every face and repeated who they were and what made them special many times. Not because she couldn’t remember, but Theia simply loved hearing about them. She was fascinated with Raven and desperately wanted to meet her. That her auntie was the leader of many people left her mouth hanging open. Bellamy’s stories were the most detailed ones. She made sure Theia knew about his love for history and mythology. The way he cared deeply for his sister and would go out of his way to protect the people he loved. That he had a too big heart and could give the best bear hugs you could ever receive.

Theia had asked Clarke to read her a story of “Mythlogy” that night which made Clarke unbelievably happy.

She was able to withdraw some books from Becca’s mansion, most of them being history books. She felt connected to Bellamy in some way when she read them.

* * *

 

It was late in the afternoon once they finally arrived at Arkadia. Clarke and Theia had come here a few times, mostly to clean things up, but the emotions she got from being in this place always made her feel unhappy. She had stayed away from their old settlement but now that the others were back Clarke felt okay with being here.

She had buried the bodies left from praimfaya outside of Arkadia. Not wanting Theia to see them in her young age. Also out of respect. She couldn’t just leave them there.

 

They had made themselves comfortable once they had settled in. Clarke and Monty carried Bellamy over to a bed in the med bay, where she began with the stitches after cleaning his wound again. He still hasn’t woken up which was a bit worrying, but everything seemed okay. His breathing was normal; he didn’t feel too hot or cold. There hadn’t been any more blood loss after Clarke’s fast response to it. She made it her task to check on him as often as possible, always within hearing distance if he made a loud noise.

“Clarke, can you hand me the radio?”

She reached for the device and handed it over to Monty. He was eager as ever to try and hack into the ships communication system, now that they had found Bellamy and with that the conclusion that the people of the ship had been actively looking for them.

That’s what he assumed anyway, why else would they try and shoot Bellamy.

“Maybe there’s another radio lying around somewhere. We could try and contact the bunker.”

Harper suggested but Clarke only shook her head. “I’ve tried to contact them but they have been radio silent since you went up to space.”

Monty looked at her with a calculating expression on his face. “Maybe you just had the wrong settings and that’s why you couldn’t contact them.”

Clarke scraped her nails over the mug she held in her hands.

“Maybe. I just figured that it was-“

The sound of footsteps made her stop. They all whipped their heads towards the door. “I think Bellamy woke up.” Clarke stood up smiling and made her way towards the door. She was about to open it when she got pushed to the ground violently, a figure jumped upon her and straddled her to the ground, holding her in a death grip. “Mama!”

Theia’s scream made Clarkes senses awaken, a new strength building inside of her. She clenched her teeth and was just about to kick her opponent in the stomach when they suddenly let go. Her blow landed in thin air.

Everything got quiet in a matter of seconds. Monty and Harper stood to the side, holding Theia back with open mouths.

“Murphy! Get off her!” Clarke spun her head around so fast she could feel her neck cracking by the sudden movement.

She was staring into blue eyes. Murphy’s blue eyes. He looked completely stunned and suddenly sprang up as if he’d been burned by her skin. Clarke still didn’t say a word, too perplexed as to why he’d just attacked her and why he was even here.

“Clarke!”

A figure pushed Murphy out of the way and extended her hand.

Raven.

She grabbed it and let the woman lift her off the ground. She looked completely gobsmacked and ecstatic at the same time.

Clarke didn’t have enough time to stand completely upright before she was crushed into a hug which took her breath away.

“Fuck Clarke we thought-“ Raven laughed and Clarke felt wetness at her cheeks yet again. “We thought you didn’t make it.” She sputtered and drew back, her hands still holding onto Clarke’s shoulders. Raven must have held her for at least a minute.

Clarke smiled brightly and noticed two other figures standing by the door.

Emori and Echo; who were watching their embrace with a puzzled look on their faces.

“Clarke what are you doing here? Why are you standing here in front of us?” It was Murphy’s voice who brought her out of her reverie.

“The nightblood. It worked didn’t it?”

Raven answered his question with a whisper. Clarke nodded at Raven and squeezed the girls’ hand that still lay on her shoulder.

“Why don’t you all sit down first? Harper’s got some tea going.” Clarke announced and jerked her head back at Harper. Raven let go of her and smiled before she quickly made her way over to Harper and Monty, followed by the other two girls that had now left the door.

Clarke noticed Murphy still standing in front of her.

“We noticed Bellamy in the other room and thought they kidnapped him or something so yeah sorry for attacking you. Just you know, thought you were one of these dicks from the spaceship.” He started rubbing his neck.

“It’s okay I’m just glad to see that you’re all okay,” Clarke answered and guided him through the room. She saw Theia huddled in close next to Monty, she looked out of place and more than overwhelmed with the situation she was in right now.

Clarke kneeled down next to her and whispered in her ear.

“Why don’t I bring you to bed sweetie.”

Theia who normally hated bedtimes and was able to stay awake for hours on end, much to Clarke’s irritation, now nodded fiercely and let her mother lift her in her arms. She buried herself in Clarke’s chest and let herself be carried away to a nearby room. It’s the one she recognized as Lincolns, once Theia and her first visited Arkadia after Praimfaya. There was a box with journals standing in the corner, covered with a guard jacket, which Lincoln only ever wore once.

“There you go.” Clarke murmured after she had tucked Theia safely into bed, an orange blanket covering her form.

“Are the others your friends too?” Theia asked into the darkness. Clarke stepped next to the bed and kneeled down on the floor.

“Yes. Those were Raven, Murphy, Echo and Emori.” Clarke whispered back.

“So the one who attacked you is your friend?”

Clarke noticed her worried tone and stroked Theia’s hair. It had grown longer over the past months. She had insisted on having it past her shoulders so Octavia could show her how to braid it like her own hair.

That was after they had passed the five-year mark, thinking the bunker would make contact now anytime soon.

“Murphy mistook me for someone else, once he recognized me he let go immediately. You don’t have to worry about him; he just wanted to protect his friends.” Theia nodded at that and closed her eyes tiredly.

“Sleep now. Tomorrow you can meet them all in your own time.”

Clarke left a kiss on her forehead and stalked over to close the door.

 

* * *

 

“So it’s true? You’ve had a daughter?”

Clarke hadn’t even sat down yet and was bombarded with questions. Monty and Harper must have told them while she was away.

Raven's perfect eyebrows were raised up to her hairline, she had a skeptical look on her face as if she couldn’t quite believe what the others had told her.

“Yeah.” Clarke smiled at her friends. “Her name is Theia.”

She was completely unprepared for Emori’s fierce hug.

“God I thought I’d be the only mother around after we noticed the bunker was still sealed.” She huffed into her shoulder.

_Ah, so they noticed the bunker was still shut so that- wait what?_

Clarke pulled back to look at her.

“I think I’m eight months along now,” Emori told her proudly.

Clarke gaped at her and noticed Murphy securing an arm around her waist.

Emori had one hand resting on her belly, absentmindedly stroking over it protectively.

“Well, I’m very happy to have a second mother around as well!” Clarke cheerfully told her and put a hand on the woman’s arm and squeezed.

“I’m really happy for you.” She was met with a returning smile.

“Sorry to interrupt but what happened to Bellamy?”

Clarke turned around to see Echo watching her. She was usually able to read expressions quite well but with Echo, she felt like running against a wall.

“He got shot in the leg. We patched him up but he still hasn’t woken up yet.”

Clarke worried her lip.

“So that means he has still no idea that you’re alive?” Raven asked and bought a cup up to her lips.

Clarke shook her head and reached for her own mug, suddenly feeling the urge to down the scolding hot liquid all at once.

“Is he…?” Murphy inquired quietly with his head focused on his shoes.

“Theia is his if that was your question,” Clarke announced drily. She didn’t feel as comfortable as before. All eyes were on her and the weight of her answer hang over their heads. Echo just stared at her disbelievingly and rather forcefully took a big gulp of tea.

“Excuse me I need some air.” Clarke stood up and gave her friends an apologetic look before rushing out of the room.

Her chest felt tight and her hands got clammy. She needed to get out. Out.

The wave of fresh air hit her face pleasantly. Clarke stalked over to the wall and slid down it like a lump of clay. Taking deep breaths of air she tried to control the feelings inside of her which were bound to just jump out of her chest and swallow her whole.

Putting her face in her hands she let herself relive the situation.

The way Echo had looked at her bitterly.

Murphy’s arm which wrapped around Emori’s growing belly protectively.

How Ravens hair was shorter than before.

They had all changed. They had all changed without her. She missed out on years.

Clarke felt like a stranger around them and that’s exactly what she was. A stranger.

Thinking that Bellamy would still feel something towards her made her feel guilty.

She only ever thought about how they’d come down to earth and everything would be fine again. But it wasn’t.

Judging from Echo’s expression she and Bellamy must be together or something. How could she think that he would wait for her? Clarke was dead to him, of course, he’d get over her eventually, and the fact that he wore her necklace doesn’t change that.

God, she was so stupid. Bellamy would probably feel uncomfortable around her, would avoid her as not to ruin any relationship he’s got going with Echo at the moment. Clarke didn’t notice that she had clenched her hands into fists so hard; her fingernails were already biting into her skin.

God forbid that they’d avoid Theia. She would not let that happen and let her daughter feel the same way as her right now.

Clarke’s shoulders tensed as she noticed Raven walking towards her.

She wiped at her cheeks angrily and tried to relax her face.

“Hey.”

Raven slumped down beside her. “Never thought I’d be so happy to sit in some mud again.” She huffed, wiping at her trousers and widening her stance so she wouldn’t touch the ground completely.

Clarke smiled weakly.

“He didn’t forget you, you know?”

Raven was talking about Bellamy. “And Echo didn’t change that.”

Clarke gulped and suddenly felt entirely stupid for sulking. She was a grown woman for god’s sake.

“Raven it’s just.” Clarke looked at the woman whose gaze was focused on the night sky.

“It’s just a bit overwhelming, and having Theia around doesn’t make that any easier.” She admitted. “I want her to have a dad. I want Bellamy to like her and not feel awkward or I don’t know, forced to like her.”

 

“I want my daughter to be loved and cared about and once I announced that he was the father I felt like intruding his relationship or something.”

Raven turned her focus on her.

“Clarke. Bellamy isn’t in a relationship. I think Echo and him have just come to some kind of understanding. They were fuckbuddies that’s all.” Raven laughed. “Hey I know that this must be hard as hell right now ‘cause you want to protect your daughter at all costs but Clarke I promise you that Bellamy will love Theia once he meets her.”

Clarke couldn’t help but notice that Raven used past tense in her other sentence which calmed her a bit. Clarke drew in a deep breath.

“Don’t misunderstand me. I want Bellamy to be happy, if he found love up in space I’d be fine with that, I was just worried about Theia. That he would dismiss her. I don’t know Raven. I just freaked out back there.”

“S’fine”

“Alright”

Clarke let her head drop back against the wall and sighed.

“But seriously you were seven people up there, from which four of you are in relationships. Some kind of tension relief was bound to happen.” Clarke nudged Raven's shoulder and winked, to which Raven just threw her hands in the air.

“You know Echo and I came to an understanding as well,” Raven smirked at her.

Clarke must have had some incredulous expression on her face because Raven burst out laughing only a second later.

“God Clarke, don’t be so surprised!” She wheezed and Clarke joined in on the laughter. “It’s just that I didn’t expect Echo and you to be a thing.”

“Woah slow down we’re not a thing.”

“Well not yet, I’m still trying to figure that one out,” Raven admitted with a grin.

“I missed you, Raven,” Clarke said and turned to her for a hug. She squeezed back delighted. “Sure you have, I’m awesome.” She quipped and stood up, holding out a hand to her the second time this day.

Clarke took it and let her be guided back into the main room where the others have made themselves comfortable under the blankets. Murphy was snoring already and the rest had relaxed looks on their faces. “Guess I’ll see you tomorrow,” Raven whispered and stepped over Monty, careful not to disrupt him. Clarke just nodded and wandered over to Theia’s room.

She quietly opened the door and checked that she was fast asleep and safe before closing it again.

_Just gonna check on him._

She wandered down the hallway and clicked the door to the med bay open.

It was fairly dark and the metal floor echoed under her feet.

Clarke then hesitantly stepped into the room just to be welcomed by an empty bed.

A bed that wasn’t supposed to be empty. She walked over to the mattress and noticed that it was still warm to the touch.

_For god’s sake Bellamy where did you go?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> RAVeN mY LoVe!!  
> So my favorite is finally back and who would have guessed that Emori's pregnant?  
> I really hope you liked this chapter. I stumbled upon some difficulties and wasn't sure if I should introduce the rest of the squad to the story all at once or not. I got into some kind of writers block and had to figure some stuff out, hence the little wait.  
> As always, if you liked it be sure to show it :)  
> -Finch


	7. Chapter VII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this took so long to update but I had so much stuff to do and didn't feel inspired to write. But here it is and I hope you enjoy it! :)

 Clarke turned on her heel and raced out of the room. She braced her hand against the doorway and tried to take a breather. She wouldn't freak out, he was probably just around the corner.  
Clarke swallowed and made her way down the hall. There weren't many places he could go since over half of the ark had been destroyed through Ilian and later praimfaya.  
But she didn't know if that thought calmed her or not, for all she knew he could have gone running off into the woods.  
_He was here and I let him slip away in front of me_.  
She was breathing heavily by now, her feet clanking against the metal floor of the ark, only to be silenced by the sight in front of her. The hallway opened up into what must have been a room, pieces of the wall were lying on the ground, scattered all over the place.  
She walked towards the opening and pulled herself over a piece of metal. Fresh air hit her face, a slight breeze howling into the hallway.  
Huffing she landed on her feet and scanned her surroundings. The lake was just in front of her, sparkling in the moonlight, dark trees were rustling in the distance. But Bellamy was nowhere to be seen.  
Grunting she marched forward, deciding that it would be best to check all exits of the ark. He can't have gone very far since his leg hasn't exactly healed yet. Clarke thought of how he must have torn all stitched open by now. She strode along the walls when a clunking sound made her pause, followed by an annoyed grunt.  
She started sprinting towards the noise and rounded the corner. She didn't notice that she held her breath until she saw him. Kicking a piece of scrap out of the way and tugging his bad leg over it.  
Clarke just stood there. To be honest she couldn't quite comprehend what she saw. This was Bellamy in flesh and blood, but this time very much alive and conscious. Affronted by some metal lying on the floor.  
She couldn't move and suddenly didn't even know what to say, she outplayed this kind of situation so many times in her mind, but nothing could prepare her for the real thing. Swallowing she took a step forward.  
"You know I would have cleaned up by now but I didn't expect any guests so…" She started, trying for confidence but instead her voice sounded breathless and tremulous.  
Bellamy whipped his head around, his dark curls bouncing in his face. He looked surprised for a moment but it was soon replaced by a look of sadness and utter devastation. He turned away and started kicking the metal again but this time with more anger. His jaw was set and he had his hands curled into fists.  
Clarke stepped back. What was happening? Wasn't he happy to see her?  
What's going on?  
"Bellamy I-"  
"No Clarke. For once I thought this was real! For once I thought we fucking made it to the ground and I'd be able to see my sister again and then you turn up and prove me wrong." He turned to face her again and looked at her with the most miserable look in his eyes. He let out a choked breath. "You showing up means that this is just another fucking dream!"  
_Oh_  
He just put his head in his hands and sunk to the ground slowly. He was utterly defeated.  
Clarke tentatively stepped forward; she tried to relax her clammy hands and overall appearance but probably failed miserably. She was shocked, to say the least. His outburst was not what she expected but as soon as he mentioned dreaming she understood. He must have experienced this before. Many times probably. And at the end of it, she always showed up to take his hope away.  
Now he sat in front of her. His head between his knees and his shoulders slumped, quietly crying into his hands.  
Clarke kneeled down next to him and held her breath. He was so close. Releasing her palm out of a fist she reached towards him and cautiously pried his hands away from his face.  
He tensed.  
He tensed and lifted his head unsurely.  
Clarke gave him a watery smile and squeezed his hand. "Bellamy. It's okay I'm here. You're on the ground, you're fine." Clarke whispered breathlessly.  
He said nothing. He only lifted his other hand and extended it to her face. The touch made her feel warm all over, a sense of relief washed over her. God how she missed his touch. Just him being here. Bellamy hesitantly caressed her face, his hand burning a path from her forehead to her cheek, only to rest there. Recognition dawned in his eyes, the wheels turning in his head. "Clarke?" It sounded strangled more than anything and she started nodding fiercely, the tears in her eyes now coming freely only to be accompanied by a comforting chuckle.  
He didn't look any better. His face was a mixture of confusion, disbelief, and euphoria.  
Bellamy now took her face in both of his hands and looked at her. His eyes searching her face for any kind of proof that this was just a dream, but seemingly he didn't find any since he pulled her into a desperate embrace, his forehead resting against her forehead, his tears mingling with her tears.  
Clarke clutched at him so tightly he must have had trouble breathing, but she didn't feel any better. He squeezed her so hard, probably to reassure himself that she was here, that this was real. Clarke didn't care that they were sitting in mud. She didn't care that rain had started to fall. She didn't care that she felt her feet getting wet and her hair getting plastered to her face.  
It remembered her of one of those movies, where whenever a dramatic reunion happened, rain started falling, making the situation just a tad more emotional.  
She pulled her face away from his and stared into his dark brown eyes.  
The moment seemed to stretch into hours, and days. Them staring at each other until Bellamy broke the silence. "Clarke I-" He turned his head sideways for a second before looking back at her with a broken expression. "Clarke I thought you were dead. For the past six years, I've convinced myself that you weren't alive anymore."  
Those words made her feel cold all over. She felt like someone had punched her in the guts, her whole body being weighed down by his confession.  
"Bellamy I am here. I'm okay. The nightblood worked we're okay." She rubbed his back and dropped her head to his shoulder, breathing in his scent that she had missed so much over the years.  
There was someone who once told her that the scent of loved ones is the thing you miss most once they are gone. When people die you still have memories, you have a face to connect them to, and you remember what they said or what things they loved. But the scent washes away as soon as that person leaves. There's no way of holding onto that and now she understood exactly what that meant. Filling her lungs with the aroma of pine and rain, and something that was unmistakably Bellamy let her really realize that he was here with her.  
"We?"  
Clarke was so distracted by her realization that she almost missed Bellamy's mumble.  
"Clarke, what do you mean ‘we'?"  
The blonde lifted her head from his shoulder and found Bellamy looking at her quizzically. She took a deep breath and composed herself, Bellamy seemed to notice and squeezed her arm.  
"Bell I wasn't alone over the past six years." She whispered and watched his face shift into confusion and relief at the same time.  
"Who was with you?" He asked; his brows knitted together.  
Clarke looked away for a second. The rain was still falling albeit lightly. It was more like a cold spray on her skin, which had erupted into goose bumps now that Bellamy wasn't hugging her anymore.  
"Clarke?"  
His eyes bore into hers as she turned to him again. She swallowed, her throat suddenly feeling scratchy.  
"Theia." Bellamy just kept looking at her patiently.  
Her throat burned by now.  
"Our daughter." She breathed and stared right back at him. Watching how his mouth dropped open slightly, his eyes widening with surprise. Bellamy dropped his hand from her arm and stood up.  
"Bellamy I-"  
She was cut short when Bellamy let out an angry grunt. She watched him kicking a piece of wood lying about a meter away. He almost looked exactly like he had ten minutes ago when he saw her the first time. Out of all the reactions, this was not what she expected. Again.  
Clarke stood up, suddenly tense all over. Her jaw was set and her teeth were clenched together. How dare he react to Theia like that? She didn't do anything other than existing. Yes, she expected him to be shocked but not angry at her. She was just about to open her mouth when he whirled around.  
So many emotions washed over his expression. Anger, fear, sadness and something she couldn't quite place.  
"Fuck Clarke I can't believe I left you! I can't believe you had a daughter down here, our daughter, and I left you to die on this planet. I should have waited! I should have protected you better!" He yelled. "I should have made sure that you were safe and we could have been together. I could have been a father to her but instead, I just left you to die!" His desperate voice sounded more and more defeated. Bellamy took a step over to her. "Clarke I am so sorry. I am so incredibly sorry for all that happened." Her mouth that was set into a hard line moments ago softened. "Bellamy there was no way you could have waited. I was still up in that tower as I saw you leave. We all would have died if you had waited. You used your head and that saved us all." Clarke exclaimed as she took his hand in hers. "Bellamy it's okay. We were fine and I didn't let our daughter forget who you are for one second." He nodded and wiped at his eyes.  
A minute went by; Him looking at the ground and her stroking her thumb over his hand.  
"Can I see her?" He muttered.  
Clarke nodded in response and pulled him in the direction of the ark.

* * *

 

He didn't let go of her hand once. Not while they were walking down the hallway, neither when she quietly opened the door to Theia's room. He rather held her more tightly, gripping her hand as she led them to the bed. He stepped after her hesitantly, moving forward without making a single sound. She clearly heard his sharp intake of breath as he saw her though. Theias light brown hair was fanned out over the cushion, her hands clutching at the orange blanket in relaxed little fists. "It's okay," Clarke whispered encouragingly and watched as Bellamy carefully kneeled down next to her. His mouth hung open loosely his eyes softened completely. "She's beautiful." He awed and Clarke saw a tear escape his eye. "She has your nose." Bellamy chuckled quietly and she squeezed his hand in response.  
"The freckles are all yours though." She said softly and he smiled in response.  
"Can I?" He looked at Clarke for confirmation who just nodded, before bringing his hand down gently to caress Theia's cheek.  
"I won't let anything bad happen to you Theia." He mumbled and Clarke felt her heart explode at that comment.  
Her little family. Right here. Together. Safe.  
She felt her eyes turning glossy yet again and sniffed.  
Bellamy caught on to that and wrapped his strong arms around her, dropping a gentle kiss to her forehead.  
Clarke smiled into his chest before pulling away and motioning him to follow her. He glanced back at Theia one last time before following her out of the room. "We should rest now. All the others are in the main room, fast asleep."  
He just nodded and let himself be guided into the main room.  
It was at that moment, when they finally settled down under some blankets, next to his closest friends over the past six years that he realized this wasn't just a dream. He pulled Clarke closer to his chest and felt himself be lulled to sleep by her soft breathing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh, my goodness! The reunion we've all been waiting for!  
> Is it what you expected? I must say I read a lot of different scenarios but never one where Bellamy thought Clarke was just another one of his hallucinations. But yay finally! Bellarke family reunited!  
> I hope you enjoyed reading. If there are any tips or criticism hit the comment button and tell me your thoughts.  
> -Finch


	8. Chapter VIII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another reunion :)

"Hey sweetie" Theia opened her dark blue eyes and glanced at Clarke who was sitting at her bedside. "It's past midday, you slept very long." She murmured with a soothing voice and smiled. Clarke had woken up only an hour ago, still wrapped safely in Bellamys arms. She held him tightly and snuggled back into him, feeling secure and protected. Clarke didn't know what to make of it. One the one hand it's all she ever wanted. For him to love her and hold her, but one the other hand she felt unsure. Theia needed to be sorted out first and she couldn't just jump into a relationship with a guy she hadn't seen for the past six years. Alright it wasn't just any guy, it was _Bellamy_ , but still. What if at the end of the week they feel like strangers to each other? With that thought she pushed herself out of Bellamys grip and stood up to greet the day.

Now she found herself in Theias room.

"How is he?" Theias voice brought her out of her stance. The little girl had sat up and looked at her unsurely.

"That's why I'm here. He's awake and I would like you to meet him."

Clarke took her daughters hand into hers and squeezed it gently. "But only if you want to do so at this moment."

Theia scrunched her forehead together in thought and then determinedly nodded. She looked so much like her father, her morning curls bouncing around her face at the movement.

Clarke had told Bellamy that she'd wake Theia and that he better wait outside. He must be fidgeting and stalking around in a circle.

"Alright then."

Theia brought her hand, which was curled into a fist, to her eyes and started to rub at them. Trying to force the last bit of tiredness out of her.

* * *

 

(Bellamy)

He has never felt so exited and unsure in his whole life. Not even his first steps on earth compare to this.

_Get a grip_

He must've been standing outside for the past three minutes but for him it felt like a whole lifetime. He was going to meet her. He was going to meet his daughter. _Their daughter._

Seeing Clarke alive was enough of a surprise but learning that they had a daughter was on a whole 'nother level. A mixture of emotions he will never forget. Seeing Clarke was like finally being pulled out from under the ground. He felt like he had been buried alive those six years ago, though it was actually quite the opposite. No, he had to fly up to space and watch the ground burn beneath him. The flames swallowing Clarke, scarring her skin, although it hadn't. She was here and he'd do everything he could to protect her. He never wants to leave her again and the thought of losing her is too much to bear. Bellamy felt the same way only ten times larger in regards to Theia. She is already his whole world even though they hadn't really met each other yet.

He would figure this out. He will find a way to love Clarke again, like he had had six years ago and he will find a way to embrace their little family. It's not like he didn't love Clarke at that moment, but six years is a long time and he has a hard time reminding his brain that she was in fact alive and here.

A scrunch of footsteps cut him short and he yanked his head up. There they are. Clarke and Theia. Bellamy felt like the world was spinning much slower, though his heart was beating even faster.

Theia was holding onto Clarkes hand and took a tentative step forward. With unsure but curious eyes she looked at him. Her father. _I'm her father._

With that thought, Bellamy kneeled down and gave her an encouraging smile which she returned. He then opened his arms wide, trusting and welcoming. Clarke gave her a little push and that's all she needed. She came rushing into his arms and threw herself into him. Brown curly hair flew all around his face and he slowly wrapped his arms around her fragile form. This hug reminded him of one he and Clarke had once shared, though it was loving in a different way. He huffed and realized he was crying silent tears. As he opened his eyes he saw Clarke tearing up in front of him. She had a huge smile on her face, the most beautiful smile he had ever seen and opened his arms for her to join them. Clarke did just so and kneeled down next to them, snuggling into his warmth and laying her arms around their daughter as well.

"I missed you daddy." If his heart could burst even more than it already had, this would be the exact moment. Theias voice was muffled in his shirt but he felt her smiling.

"I missed you too." He whispered and pressed a kiss to both Theia and Clarkes hair.

They would figure this out. _They would learn to love each other again._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so very sorry you had to wait this long for this rather short chapter but I had a massive writers block. As I already said this is my very first fanfic and phew it is a ride I wasn't quite prepared for.. I felt like this was kind of rushed but I had to get this out there since I felt bad for making you wait much longer  
> I don't know where this is heading and having both reunions done was my goal for this story but I feel like I owe you more.. If you have any requests of what you would like to see just throw em in the comments. :)  
> On another note, thank you so much for reading. I can't promise more to this story but I hope you liked it this far. Thanks also for all the lovely comments and kudos I have received. They truly are a motivation.  
> -finch


	9. Done

Welp  
Sorry to disappoint you but this is not a new chapter...

Season 5 has kinda ruined Bellarke for me and my motivation has gone for good. I'm very sorry to everyone who enjoyed this but I can't leave you hanging here, without knowing if this story will ever be finished.  
For everyone in the back:  
This story won't be completed

 

I want to thank you all for all the comments and kudos!! This means so much to me since it was my very first fanfiction and my first story in English. 

So thank you and may we meet again! :)


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